On Redemption
From TSade
I was listening to the radio this morning and they were talking about the sex offender law being passed that would mark sex offenders for life. This bothered me for a couple of reasons, and when I talked about it to my mate and friends, I was systematically told that I was stupid and had no concept of the problems with sex offenders. Well, not stupid, but just clueless, I guess.
So, it sounds like I'm wrong, but I see it as another slide towards a very frustrating and restrictive life. Why? I don't have a problem with people paying their crimes, and I realized that though most people coming out of prison have “paid their debt to Society,” that there are people who continue to commit the crimes even after they return. So, to handle this, they have the sex offender registry which all the sex offenders must keep their location updated, so people can know about it at any time. This comes from the need to know that someone who committed a crime may be down the street and that a parent may need to pay special attention to them.
There are a lot of potential for abuses in this. People are stupid and vindictive, plus they jump to conclusions. Not to mention, they strike out at people who commit a harm in their eyes. In the Wired article, I found this quote:
And then there are the cases where innocent people are attacked because the online registry information is incorrect. Sex offenders are required by law to notify the police when they move, but sometimes fail to do so, with disastrous consequences. An address error in the Texas Internet database caused a gang of gung-ho moralizers to attack a retarded Dallas man who happened to live at a home previously occupied by a sex offender who didn't bother to update his record. (http://www.wired.com/news/business/0,1367,53075,00.html?tw=wn_story_related)
People don't want “those people” in their neighborhoods. They will almost violently fight against it (http://www.widigest.com/html/olson_51205.htm) and they do with a passion. That passion is going to be there, probably until the end of time. And you expect people not to lash out at these people? But, they'll be on a list, for the end of time.
That scares me in some way. I was curious, so I went to the Illinois registry and they had an interesting little point: “Anyone who uses this information to commit a criminal act against another person is subject to criminal prosecution. (http://www.isp.state.il.us/sor/frames.htm)” So, basically it is against the law, but that doesn't mean people won't hurt or harass someone. Plus, can you honestly expect the police, who are human just like the rest of us, not to discount them, once they find out they are one of those horrible people that everyone hates? Even though the police are suppose to be not biased, at least in terms of this, you have to wonder if they honestly would treat a known criminal as just another person. I did wander through the Illinois site, which made me feel a little better, since they make a distinction between various types of sex offenders, including the ones that parents need to worry about.
When I was talking about it with a friend, she said that sex offender for life was the preferred situation. She basically claimed that all sex offenders were neurologically hardwired to be a sex offender and there would never be a cure for them. Basically, if you commit a sex crime, you will always commit crimes and it is just a matter of time.
Now, this leads into the place that I have some problems with. You can be a sex offender for groping a child. Okay, that is a bad thing. That also includes consensual groping, but remember, children are the stupid that need to be protected. What I mean by “stupid” is that so many people think that children are incapable of anything on their own, even if they are sixteen or seventeen. I also think that children are aware enough they could also claim this, to hurt someone, but I'm used to very manipulative children (my siblings), so I'll pretend that all children are perfectly honest. If you do it once, you are then marked for life. In Texas (from the Wired article above), children are convicted as adults, even if they are fourteen. So, if a fourteen year old has sex with a thirteen year old, and is successfully charged by pissed off parents, that child is marked for life which could be sixty or seventy years or even more. So, according to my dear friend, that child will always be a sex offender, because they will spend their entire life, just inches away from raping or molesting children. And, according to that article, they have to put a big sign in their front yard, for the rest of their life.
One of the things I have had a problem with is the idea that people can't change. There is no concept of redemption in that. I will admit that there are people who won't change in half a century of life, but I also think most people change drastically over the decades. The person I was when I was fifteen is a much different person than who I am now, almost thirty. But, because that fourteen year old will always be “broken” then they will always be a sex offender.
So, there is no redemption for those who commit sex crimes. This is related to my dislike of Zero-Tolerance rules and laws. Also with the rules in the federal aid papers that if you ever had a drug conviction (which includes being drunk and disorderly in public for some judges, or even being in the same room as a drug user), you can never get financial aid. I believe that these two things have already started to merge. In the early days of my interest in this topic, I saw an article dealing with the fact that someone was convicted because they found a single image in the browser cache of an underage child. Now, there may be more tolerance toward “normal viewing” where you might encounter someone who might look underage. When you have laws like COPA, which will eventually be passed again, even the hint of a child will be enough to put you on the sex offender's list.
Of course, the measure of what is a “child” is a very frustrating point. Anime, specifically hentai, shows characters to be of all ages where even an adult could be portrayed as being child-like. Or, closer to my worries, if the law starts saying even stories, without pictures or images, can't have that content, then suddenly I'm in trouble since I have a few stories of that nature. Ignore the fact that most of them are commentaries that we basically mind-fuck our children from the very beginning. And if I didn't write a single one again, in twenty years, I would still be a sex offender because I'm forever wired to want to abuse children. Just ask my friend.
I wasn't one before this mythical point... oh wait, it wasn't mythical when COPA was around, but if it comes back, I'll be broken once again, a terrible creature slobbering with the thought of getting a child into my lair to have my evil ways.
Zero-tolerance is so much fun, isn't it? Not to mention the changing nature could change what is a predator in a very short period of time. Just one crisis, properly set up, could convince everyone that even stories lead to predators and that all sex writers should be marked on the sex offenders list.
Looking over the Illinois FAQ for who is a sexual predator, I realize I have probably written about almost half of the things on that list. I won't do it, but broad laws don't handle that. They treat everyone as a classification because there isn't enough time to know your sexual predator, get to know them, take them out on a few dates, to individually write a couple pay essay on them. So, I guess I live in fear for the day when even writing is considered worth of the sex offenders registry and I will forevermore be a broken, terrible person.
I will admit, I do not put children on a pedestal. There are a lot of reasons for that, some of them are probably purely emotional. As I've written before, I think that laws should be written for everyone, regardless of sex, sexual preference, religion, and age. Making a special law for children doesn't make sense to me because I think all rapists, regardless if they hunt down girls under eight or take advantage of women in nursing homes should have the same punishment.
But, children are important. They are young and cute and they inspire that desperate need to protect them. That same need should be for every person, every living creature, not just the cute ones. You rarely have massive laws, registries, and wonderful “news” to protect against those who rape old people. Looking at the Illinois registry, most of it is dealing with children under eighteen. Older people don't matter as much. So, what is the magic point when a children ceases to be a treasured commodity and slides into a commonplace?
Rape is a terrible thing. It bothers me greatly with that sick sensation that clings to the bottom of your ribs, a twisting that bores down on your spine until the tears come dripping from your eyes. Rape and hurting people are terrible, terrible things. But, it is just as terrible if it was my mate as it was for a child of mine. Even with that, I think there is a chance that someone will find redemption, realize the errors of their way. There is a redemption for someone and I refuse to believe that people don't change... ever.
This essay doesn't resolve anything for me. In fact, it just makes my frustration as life even more, but if I don't write it, I'll fester. I don't have an answer for it, nor do I think there is one. The most logical response, at least from one point of view, is to take the advice of a co-worker and turn my back on sex and brutality and write “God's Word with my wonderful talent.” Stop writing about sex, brutality, and mortality. That is the safest because no one gets in trouble just writing about religion and the love of man. Unless you aren't follow the most popular religion. Or, are fighting a country that has a different one. Or you inspire a Crusade. Never mind.
But, as my friend believes, I'm hardwired into being a brutal monster. There is no redemption for me because it is part of who I am, and even if I live to be a century old, I'll continue to be the same brutal, disgusting monster that I am today. Because there is no redemption, to hope for people like me.
Writing about “God's Word” or in my case, something probably related to Wicca and the love of your fellow man, wouldn't be enough. I could spend a lifetime writing wonderful words, but since I wrote “Special Treats” a few years ago, I'm still damned to whatever hell someone believes in.
I'm broken.
I will always be broken.
